Nice to meet you!

A little about me.

Hello! I’m Tiffany. And I’m a workaholic.

For years, my life has been consumed with efforts to unf*ck health & healthcare - one post, one conversation, one patient at a time

July 2024 has been different - characterized by fluff.

It started innocently enough with posts, conversations & chatter that had no hope of saving anyone but myself.

And like the start of many antagonistic behaviors, I told myself it would just be 1 deviation.

- Just 1 shift of focus to get over the hump of exhaustion & overwhelm.
- Just 1 indulgence to settle my mind & soul to invite restful sleep back in.
- Just 1 peek into a different aspect of life for a much needed moment of distraction.

Breathing in… & out until - Holy Sh*t

That did feel better…

I wanted to go back to the regularly scheduled programing…

Outrage & disgust directed at the entities who seek to control and take advantage of the vulnerable, followed by advocacy & promotion of thoughtful solutions.

But you’ve been there before, and you know how this story goes…

1 moment became 2
And 2 became 4
And 4 became…

Well, all of them.
Consequently & unexpectedly, I’m now capable of taking a deep breath again.

Now - my mind wanders & wonders.

At bedtime, I've picked up books unrelated to politics, personal development or medicine.

On weekends, I've taken walks, ridden my bike & started lifting again.

I feel less angry, less frantic, & the lens of my world seems to capture more of its environment.

Instead of rage, disappointment, feelings of failure or inadequacy to this change, I’m consumed with relief.

- Relief from the inappropriate, all-encompassing drive to save every human that has endured a failure of our medical system.

- Relief from needing to know “the right path” for my patients (& from the imposter syndrome resulting from the knowledge that no one does).

- Relief from the self-imposed pressure to create continuous, maximal change so that the vulnerable aren’t swept up and written off as collateral damage.

To be clear, it’s not that I don’t still feel those things.

I do.

Every one of them all at once actually, but it’s not all-consuming.

What I’ve realized recently is that “zooming-in,” in itself, was never really the problem.

Just like noticing, ‘there’s something in my shoe’ isn’t inherently intolerable. What’s intolerable is noticing, “there’s a f*cking pebble in my shoe, & it hurts."

There’s no question in my mind, the US healthcare system IS broken.

This awful, filtered selfie shows lines that reveal just how much.

And I know that hyperfocus & obsession are exactly what will change things.

They’re necessary… as is suffering. But to sustain the drive & momentum needed to unf*ck anything, you sometimes have to "zoom-out"

You have to acknowledge ALL of the parts of yourself.

Because you are more than the sum of your parts, and so am I.

There’s peace in that.

So let me (re-) introduce myself

I’m Tiffany Ryder.

NFL Cheerleader turned Emergency Medicine PA & Healthcare Reformer.

Fiercely independent, stubborn, optimistic & humble - to a fault.

Dancer, writer, mom, multi-texter.

Nice to meet you.

I’m excited to continue building connections here more broadly.

Thanks for reading.